Making a Difference

I think I’ll get to the point of this blog. I had mentioned before how I was rarely ever accepted in the deaf community because most deaf folks didn’t accept me for who I was. The choices I made and the things I do or don’t do. I mentioned the situation that happened with me at a restaurant between my parents and a group of deaf people. I never understood WHY I couldn’t be accepted for who I was.

They gave me reasons but they seemed pretty bleak. I could talk, I didn’t know Sign Language, and I was damaging myself by doing Cued Speech. Name it, I heard it all. I was being mainstreamed, I was not attending a deaf school, and I was wearing Hearing Aids. I was doing everything “Wrong”. *sighs* I don’t recall telling them what they were doing was wrong, disrespecting their lifestyle or choices or anything.

It was events like these I stayed away from deaf people. Deaf events, clubs organization. It was always the same story. I got really tired of it. However, I knew I had to eventually learn ASL at some point, so I ventured online to check some resources. We already know how I came across Geo’s site. Why did I stick around? I was sure I’d get bashed again and questioned for my choices; I mean it seemed everyone else did it!

I thought ok maybe for once these people will be different. I ventured to the chat room introduced myself. They asked me questions getting to know me. I said I didn’t know Sign Language. *screech*. I also said I called myself Hearing Impaired. *screech*. Wait, what was that? No one said anything to me…I just got oh cool, well welcome here! Wait, what did you say?! WELCOME HERE?!” Wow, that’s new to me! I thought something was wrong here, where are the questions or statement’s saying I am doing something wrong? There wasn’t any!

Holy mackerel! Amazing, people actually accepted me! What’s better is people like Geo went out to reach me and tried to learn more about me. Not ONCE, EVER questioning my choices, just nodded his head, understood why I did them and accepted it. He of course would voice his opinions and say I don’t agree with some thing’s you say about yourself but that’s fine. As long as you understand why. Holy, cow, someone taking the time to explain and teach me WHY some people didn’t agree with my life style.

He went on to explain why some deaf people don’t like it when I used Hearing-Impaired. By Gosh, I finally understood. Here was someone instead of going after me for calling myself Hearing-Impaired, he explained why, and made me understand. Then left it up to me to go on. I of course will still call myself H-I for awhile because it is just what I used for so long. I won’t easily forget. However because someone like him took the time to go on and explain, I became more open minded and was willing to change it a bit to more of Hard of Hearing, or even Deaf.

When I take a step back and look, to see the difference in this wonderful website with Geo. I look at Abbie who has a CI. I look at myself with Hearing Aids, and Geo who has neither. We are all so different but we still are part of the community of being Deaf. I really agree with the statement “we sleep in silence, too” It really is true, during the day, we use whatever resources we can use to make our day better, whether it is using ASL, a CI, Hearing Aids. However at the end of the day, we still join together in silence. We are truly a wonderful group and I look forward to every night getting on the computer and sharing the laughter and jokes with Geo and Abbie and others online. I really feel like I belong.

It is my hope that if you are one of those who don't accept people like me to maybe one day accept us into the deaf community, and to understand the choices I made. All it took was someone like Geo to change my outlook and make me understand and want to be a part of this wonderful deaf community. Teaching me ASL and continuing to educate me in the deaf culture and all. There truly is no better teacher then experience itself.

Alex